I’m pretty sure you are sitting behind your computer screen wondering what I mean. How many of you have ever told someone “no”, but it seemed like your response fell on deaf ears? Whether it was telling the “drunk overly aggressive” jerk at the bar “no” to his persistent request to have your number, or “no” to your whining children at the grocery store begging for a toy or candy, sometimes saying “no” just doesn’t do the trick!
With each scenario you may have experienced saying “no” almost seems to trigger some invisible force within the opponent to challenge your firm disposition despite your finality. You hear so many stories about people telling someone “no” and depending on the other party that person may or may not walk away with repercussions. What happened to people respecting your wishes and taking the highroad?
It seems as though the mere thought of rejection strikes people as unacceptable. I was put through a situation at my former job regarding me applying for a training position. I was approached by a particular person who thought I would be a great fit, but I politely declined. I thought my decision would have been respected and I would be left alone, but little did I know that same person approached me the very next day and this time ‘told me’ that I was applying. I became silent and internally tried to process what just happened. “Did they not hear me the first time?” or “Did I not say no firmly enough?” The situation resulted in me sharing some insight on my personal life and finally the person backed down. But should it have even came to that point?
Why did it take for me to share my personal life for my “no” to be heard? It almost seems like a form of mental abuse for someone to ignore your reply and continue to pressure you. Now there are certain situations where saying “no” could potentially harm you, and by all means I hope someone could persuade you to change your mind. The situations I have in mind are the ones where no harm or potential threat was imposing on your life. It’s your right to say “no” and you should never have to feel like you owe someone an explanation for your decisions. A wise man once said, “I refuse to please others at the expense of my emotional well-being. Even if it means saying no to some people who are use to hearing yes!”
Uninterrupted Thoughts 